Wednesday, 19 August 2020

Not on skin, not on gender; the bedtime stories (White).


Very well children, 

I will read you a bedtime story.

And with that I picked up the book 

of colourless and genderless fairytales.


White. 

Everything is white. 

The picture on the wall, 

the room in his mind. 

Only his life 

seems to be black, 

white and grey.

Like a wounded animal 

they shut themselves, 

He him, 

out.


Lock out from what? 

Is there at all 

something 

worth 

to prevent being excluded.

He shouts 

at the empty 

whiteness.


White, 

He whispers to his love. 

Regretttably, 

he fears, 

she too can only think grey.


The lecherous greyness 

of the masses, 

o how he detests it, 

he calls 

silently 

at his gray love.

His naked love says: 

you're mad, my archangel, 

what do you mean by white?


Well, 

what does he mean 

by white. 

White, 

he wispers, 

white is white 

and 

white is as a blank page, 

virginal white for the eye 

but 

already tarnished 

or 

stained with grey. 

I'm looking 

for the true 

primordial white. 

The white 

that stands for 

innocense and liberty, 

where I can 

let the idle defenseless children 

of my imagination roam smoothly. 

White is not a colour, 

he concludes deeply.


Without any trouble 

or remorse 

he just shut out

his grey naked love. 

Black 

he is now, 

black 

to preserve 

the white. 

To prevent 

that the grey 

of his love 

affects 

his precious white.


White, 

they whisper 

smiling at each other. 

Her smile 

that of incomprehension 

but full of love 

that accepts his insanity. 

His smile 

that of betrayal 

and loneliness. 


Quietly they huddle 

against each other.

Just before 

his naked love 

falls asleep

he hears her 

breathe: 

tomorrow, tomorrow 

I will try 

to be white for you. 

And he realizes, 

in a wave of clarity 

through his own gray 

delusional world,

that his only love 

is already white.


And so 

my children

ends this fairytale.

maybe next time I will

read you a story on grey

and later or before on black.


For now 

I wish you 

a quiet night 

full of love

and of sleep.



© Oct. 1985 - Aug. 2020



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